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Stop worrying about things you can't control (I)

Paint By Numbers Blog-Stop worrying about things you can't control (I)-Canvas by Numbers

At Canvas by Numbers, we make a committed effort to personal development and healthy hobbies that contribute to increasing physical and mental well-being, such as paint by numbers for adults, an activity in which we specialize. In these pandemic times we are going through, self-care has become more necessary than ever: taking care of ourselves to be able to take care of others.

Most of the time, self-care takes a back seat, postponed until there's a gap in the daily hustle and bustle, and family or work obligations make way for a few precious but irregular free minutes.

However, there is a primary and inescapable duty for all of us: self-care. At Canvas by Numbers, we insist, it's an obligation. The people with whom we share our environment suffer or enjoy us depending on the mood and level of positivity we show in every moment. Your family, friends, colleagues, etc., will appreciate the effort you put into your physical and emotional well-being, as nobody is comfortable with or desires the company of a stressed grump. Both aspects of self-care are important and should be equally worked on:

  • Physical well-being, feeling agile, healthy, and comfortable in our bodies, conditions our emotional state.
  • Conversely, a good emotional state will drive us to take care of our health with appropriate schedules, exercise, and healthy food.

Issues like stress, anxiety, or existential angst are the battlegrounds of self-care and, right now, they are largely a result of fear, fear of life, fear of the (near or distant) future, negative thoughts about it, and the ability to face it because the pandemic has shown us how fragile and unpredictable the future and life, in general, are.

Be cautious! If these factors (stress, anxiety, and anguish) aren't managed properly, an unhealthy need for control over people and things is likely to emerge. Mastering the unrest caused by unwanted situations is not simple and requires a lot of balance; this is when the "controller" within us emerges. At first glance, the figure of the controller may appear strong, but it's quite the opposite; it's a direct consequence of fear and the inability to overcome it.

There's an undeniable truth that some people refuse to accept: they have no control over many things that happen in their lives. Normally, those who resist admitting this truth become control fanatics and develop their character along two defined lines:

  • They refuse to delegate tasks (nobody can do it as well as they can, regardless of the task).
  • They try to force other people to change according to their own criteria (if you act as I say, everything will go well; otherwise, it will be a disaster).

It's a vicious circle. Both are results of stress, and in turn, they feed more stress. People are permanently busy because (in their view) others don't measure up at work, they consume excessive energy in trying to get others to follow their directions, and frustration, anger, or annoyance arise when their goals aren't met.

People who are controlling start from a mistaken belief: if they can gain enough control over others and the situations they find themselves in, they can avoid events that will harm them. They consider themselves possessors of absolute truth and seem to have a crystal ball for predicting upcoming events. We all recognize the profile, and we've all encountered this figure on more than one occasion. The logical reaction is to distance oneself; who wants someone like that close?

There's another group of people who, despite being aware of their true ability to change certain situations and their relevance in a global context, know that they can't prevent bad things from happening, but they still worry about them. They live in constant unease, in anguish, fearing everything from natural disasters to fatal illnesses, always on the lookout for themselves or their loved ones, as well as all kinds of unexpected accidents. Worries colonize their minds and create alerts for every new situation. It's sad because they waste time and energy.

Here, the emphasis should be on balance. It's not about living recklessly, prudence is always a value to consider. Avoiding unnecessary risk situations is a sign of intelligence, but worrying about what's beyond our control serves no purpose and doesn't solve anything.

It's not a simple exercise to distance oneself to assess what affects us and its actual capacity to do so. This is the aspect of stress we're going to focus on, and if it applies to you, if you waste time and a significant part of your happiness worrying about events/people beyond your control, the advice we've compiled in the second part of the post can help you.

We hope you enjoyed the introduction and are encouraged to read the second part. Don't miss our advice. You'll find them at Stop Worrying About Things You Can't Control (II).

To conclude this first part, it's worth mentioning that the images of paint by numbers canvases included in this article belong to the Mandalas Collection, canvases that, due to their special composition, invite relaxation of the mind and body. Paint by numbers is a creative activity that compels your mind to disconnect from worries. Once you focus on the canvas, areas to paint, and see results, your mind switches to the calm and enjoyment channel.

You can check out the home page of Canvas by Numbers for other suggestions that may be more appealing to you. We're waiting for you!

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